Our life isn’t probably normal. I’ve got to hand it to my tribe, though, they deal with my chaos and make it work. Real estate has been especially insane as of late, but everyone’s coping and handling my stress just fine. I couldn’t adore them any more than I do, the big buncha weirdos.
Not to make you super jealous or anything, but here are two examples of how my family has adapted to my strange Realtor/Mom (Momtor, if you will) existence:
1. Sunday morning, 9:25 AM
Me (almost vibrating with stress): Babe? Jason? I need you to help me out here. Can you come over here really quick?
Jason (from the couch, ready to watch a baseball game on one of his only days off): Uh… I guess… do I have to?
Me: YES. YOU HAVE TO. RIGHT NOW OR I’M GOING TO START SLAMMING MY OWN FOREHEAD INTO MY LAPTOP KEYBOARD.
Jason: OK, ok… (sits down next to me). What do you need?
Me: So here’s the thing, I have to get these two contracts written up and put in Dropbox so I can access them on my iPad. Then I have to get in the shower and get dressed to show two properties in Gilbert. Immediately following that I have to take a contract over to another buyer’s house to have them sign it. This will probably all take me until about 2:30 PM. We’re going to my parents’ tonight for dinner and we have to stop at the rental property on the way to make that repair we promised. The problem is, I haven’t grocery shopped for the week yet. I can likely hit the store on my way home from the contract signing, but I need to have all of the meals planned and the shopping list made out before I leave.
Jason: Yeah, that sounds like a lot. You should probably get working on it.
Me: Funny. *twitch, twitch* No, you see, the time doesn’t actually exist in this dimension for me to plan the meals and make the list and meet my clients on time while not smelling like yesterday’s funk. Possibly if I could freeze the clock or clone myself it would be an option. However, if you follow me in to the bathroom with the iPad and help me brainstorm and make out the meals list and the grocery list while I’m showering and getting ready, it might work. OK?
Jason: *SIGH* Yep. We’ll get it done.
That conversation is why, if you were at my house Sunday morning, you would have seen my husband laying on the carpet in front our master bath with my iPad, taking notes on my meal planning and grocery list apps while I frantically dried my hair and applied eyeliner.
It’s also why we have food in the fridge for meals this week and my head didn’t actually explode yesterday.
2. I found this while cleaning out the car yesterday:
It’s in my middle son’s handwriting. It translates to:
To Do List
1. Bounce U
3. 2 houses
4. Jonas to take a nap
5. I read
6. Ben to have free time
7. Barros (I know it looks like he wrote ‘bars’ but that’s not what he meant. We go to Barros Pizza on Fridays. We go to the bars on Wednesdays.)
When I asked Gray about this ‘to-do list’ he told me he wrote it when I gave them the run down of the daily schedule for Friday. I’m a scheduler. Even on ‘Friday Summer Fun Day’ I have to have a general plan for how the day will run. I tend to think my kids aren’t listening except to the part about how we’re going to Bounce U first thing. Apparently I was wrong. Kid likes to have a list.
I’m so lucky to have my family in this with me.