The highs and lows of parenting and real estate.

The Luck of the Draw

There are things I’ve accomplished or created in my life that I’m so proud of, I almost feel like I can’t take credit for them. It’s more like they were a lucky accident or a muse working through me. For instance, I choreographed two dance pieces in high school (one to Alanis Morrisette’s All I Really Want and the other to Bridge Over Troubled Waters by Simon and Garfunkel) that I still think back on and feel a swelling of pride in my stomach. I know, it’s kind of a silly thing to be so proud of, but I am. I feel similarly about my National Merit Scholar status from high school. It was just one test I did really well on (and I can’t help but wonder if gum actually got stuck to my test and screwed up the grading machine like on that one Simpson’s episode where they think Bart is a genius), but it’s one of those things I save to think about when I need a little ego boost.

I feel so similarly, on a much greater scale, about Ben. Every night right before he goes to bed, we have this conversation:

Me: I love you.
Ben: I love you a zillion.
Me: I love you a zillion plus one.
Ben: I love you a zillion plus a zillion.
Me: I love you a zillion times a zillion.

It’s a silly little bedtime ritual and it always proceeds a bit longer with a few ‘infinity’s thrown in until it’s just really time to go to bed.

Two nights ago he ended it like so:

Ben: I love you… (pausing, with a thoughtful look on his face, and then with a sly smile) beyond.

Sometimes I wonder just how it’s possible that so much sweet brilliance is packed inside that five year old; and then I wonder how it’s possible that he’s mine. Such amazing luck, I have.

And then, of course, there’s Gray. I mean seriously, when you ask him where his nose is, he makes this face:


How much more perfection can you expect?

Beyond, indeed, I love you both beyond.

6 Responses to The Luck of the Draw

  1. Aw. Tears are welling up in my eyes. Love those boys.

  2. incredibly sweet…sigh

  3. I think that face most certainly can be attributed to Daddy. I’ve seen him make that face with a couple of things coming out of the other side of that little boy 🙂

  4. When you were just about exactly Ben’s age and we were living on the farm in Big Rock, you and I were walking outside one Summer afternoon. The wind was really gusting and the stand of giant trees that went down the lane was blowing back and forth. You stopped and looked up at me and said, “I love the wind, because it makes the trees laugh”. The thing was, I was thinking at that exact moment that those trees looked like giant green men, bending back and forth guffawing. My heart almost exploded when you looked right at me and said exactly what I was thinking. It’s on my short list of favorite moments with Mini.


  5. Of course, I didn’t mean that I just have a short list of favorite moments with Mini. I mean its on a short list of favorite-favorite moments with Mini. Like, top ten of a long list… oh, nevermind.


  6. Oh, what a sweet father/daughter moment..hehe. That story made me tear up a little.. i think I’m going to file that phrase away for future reference “I love the wind, because it mades the trees laugh”.. hehe..

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